The PHUNT 25K was quite a bit tougher than I’d anticipated going in — lots of mud, snow and HILLS — but it was a very well organized event and the perfect change of scenery (and pace) from the solo long runs on the road I’ve been doing.
Saturday started pretty early. Clark’s dad stopped by at 5:30 a.m. to pick up Pepper, and Melissa got here 10 minutes later to pick up me.
It took about two hours to get to Elkton. We got to the race site at Fair Hill Natural Resources Management Center a bit more than an hour before the 9 a.m. start. Plenty of time to get our race bibs and swag (buff, pint glass and can koozie), hit the bathrooms and get suited up for a winter trail run.

Welcome banner outside the activity hall near the start/finish line.

Melissa with her back to the camera and me in the white sweatshirt, right after we got to the activity hall. (KSG Photography photo credit.)

And then when we were ready to go!
There was snow and rain in the forecast for Saturday, but it wasn’t supposed to start until later in the afternoon, when hopefully everyone would be done running. Until then, it was just kinda cold and gray. There was wind, but it was negligible since we spent most of our time in the woods.
Just before 9, the race director, Carl, had everyone sing “Happy Birthday” to two runners whose birthdays fell on Saturday, and then we all filed out of the nice warm activity hall and gathered behind the start line.
There was an air horn and we were off!
The very first couple of tenths of a mile were on clear pavement.

Just after the start. (K_S_G Photography credit.)
Then we turned onto another road, but it hadn’t been plowed. Apparently Elkton got a lot more snow than we did the previous weekend, and it’d stayed colder up there, because there was still plenty on the ground the entire race course. It was pretty much all gone at home by the end of the week, so I was surprised to see it.

Snowy road in the first mile. I took this after I finished the 25K. There were a lot more runners on it the first time I ran through here.

About a mile in, getting to the end of that road. (Danielle Vennard photo credit.)
We turned off the road and ran along the tree line through a grassy field, and then, a little more than a mile in, we finally got on the single track trails that made up the majority of the course.
My whole race plan was just to stick to Melissa’s heels. She was doing the 50K, two laps of the course, while I was only doing half that, so I figured I should be able to hang with her.
The trails were slick with mud already, with plenty of huge rocks and roots, some hidden by snow, to turn an ankle on if you didn’t pay close attention. Melissa and I chugged along in a congo line of other runners.
I could already feel it in my quads when we got to the first aid station at mile 3.7, and the climbs hadn’t even been that bad yet, as I would find out. I hadn’t done myself any favors by skipping out on the last several hill repeat workouts!

Smiled for the camera, but I didn’t dare take my eyes off the trail as I’m pretty sure I’d have wiped out. (MDR photo credit)
At the aid station, I wasn’t hungry yet, so I just drank a small cup of ginger ale. Melissa had some Coke, which one of the volunteers — I would later find out they were college ROTC cadets — thought was REALLY weird. At least we’d skipped the beer that was also there!
The stop at the aid station broke up the congo line of runners a bit, which was nice. I mean, we were never alone out there, but it wasn’t bumper to bumper anymore after that.
Back in the woods, it was another 4.2 miles to the second aid station. I got into a groove for a couple miles and had a chance to look around at the scenery. It was really pretty. At one point, we were running along the edge of a hill near a rushing creek. Melissa and I discussed coming back for a training run in the fall, we were enjoying ourselves so much.
Then we crossed a bridge and ran a loop that knocked me out of that groove. I think that was where we hit the first couple of small climbs we had to hike.
We went back across that bridge and made a slight left, and then we were at the second aid station at mile 7.9.
As we were running up on it, Melissa, who’d run this race for the first time last year, told me, “This is the GOOD one.” Don’t get me wrong, the other two aid stations were well-stocked too, but this one had it all. In addition to the typical sweet and salty snacks and energy gels, the volunteers had dragged in a generator to power a griddle, and there was plenty of hot options, like chicken broth, bacon, perogies and grilled cheese, with or without bacon. I helped myself to a couple grilled cheese quarters and some bacon, washed down with Coke. Pretty sure I also ate some Swedish Fish.
The aid stations are always my favorite thing about trail runs. I would never eat bacon and grilled cheese and drink Coke while running a road marathon. I’d puke! But it’s all fine on trails.
Melissa and I also both used the port-o-potties at this aid station (I didn’t have to go to the bathroom in the woods once!) and then we went on our way. Just past the aid station, we got to run over a covered bridge, and then it was back to climbing hills.
We were running up on the start of one climb when I saw a runner in front of us break out some retractable climbing poles. I’ve never run the kind of terrain that requires those poles to help pull you up, but she was definitely the smartest person out there at that moment. It was very slow going up that hill, probably the steepest on the course.
The next couple miles were more of the rolling hills, and before I knew it, we were at the third and final aid station at mile 10.6.
This one had a Hans and Franz theme, and a bunch of volunteers in gray sweatsuits welcomed us by yelling “insults” at us in vaguely German accents as we descended the short steep hill to the aid station — things like, “Ooh, look at her legs, they’re like spaghetti noodles!” haha. (People still know Hans and Franz from Saturday Night Live, right? My dad used to quote them all the time.)

Hans and Franz cheering us into the aid station. (Danielle Vennard photo credit.)

Melissa and me coming to the aid station. (Danielle Vennard photo credit.)
I had more ginger ale and then grabbed a small cup of dark chocolate-covered espresso beans. I remember my grandmother had some of those on her kitchen table once when I was a little kid, and I ate some, thinking they were chocolate-covered raisins, and promptly spit them out. They tasted pretty freaking awesome this time though.
Then Melissa and I took off for the final five-mile stretch back to the finish line (or, in her case, the halfway mark.)
I don’t remember much about this last stretch, just that it felt like it took forever. I mean, it was in fact the longest stretch between aid stations or the start/finish area, but it felt exponentially longer.
I just stuck to Melissa and tried to ignore my screaming leg muscles as we hiked up hills and bombed down the other sides.
Finally, we popped out of the woods for the last time, and a volunteer told us to turn left and go up “one last little hill” on the snow-covered road back to the start/finish line.
This wasn’t the steepest hill, but it was the longest, and it was right at the end! We ran the whole way up though.
At the top, we were back near the activity hall, and a couple short turns later, we were right back where we started.
We crossed the line in 3:08:12.

Done! (Simon Crisp photo credit.)
My Garmin measured 15.7 miles, an 11:59/mile average pace. The official race distance was 15.9, which made it an 11:50/mile pace. Either way, about four minutes slower than my average pace for my run just a day earlier!
A volunteer handed me a finisher’s medal, then tried to give one to Melissa, but she waved it off, since she had to go do that all over again.
Before she took off for the second lap, she stopped in the activity hall to strap some mini ice spikes to her shoes, for better traction on the snowy parts. And then, before she could get too comfortable, she left.
I, on the other hand, sat for quite a while. I couldn’t imagine running another step on those trails. But I had time to kill and a mileage goal for the month, and I knew I wouldn’t want to run anything Sunday. So I got my phone and decided to go out and get some pictures, run as far as I wanted and then turn around.
My piece of crap phone, of course, did not make it very far before it froze up and died. I got the above pictures of the race banner right outside the activity hall and then the snowy road at mile 0.4 before it shut itself off. Ugh.
For some reason, I kept running and decided I’d run to the first aid station at mile 3.7, then take a shortcut on the road back to the finish area, which should give me about 4.5 miles total.
The first 1.25 miles or so wasn’t so bad, on the road and then through the grassy field. Then I got on the trails.
They were 100 times muddier the second time around, after 500-plus runners ran through on the first lap! I wasn’t running much, just trudging through the mud. There weren’t a lot of 50K runners out there (there were 382 finishers in the 25K, compared to just 93 in the 50K) and it got pretty lonely.
Worse, I was absolutely starving. I hadn’t eaten anything else between the espresso beans at mile 10.6 and starting my “bonus” run, and I was really feeling it.
Between the mud and my rumbling stomach, I got slower and slower. I was checking the distance on my Garmin every 10th of a mile, sometimes less. Why was I out there?? It felt like I was going to die in those stupid woods haha. (I can get very dramatic in my head when I’m hungry and cold.)
Finally I made it to the aid station. I told the volunteers I wasn’t part of the race anymore — I’d taken off my bib before I left — but they gave me hot chicken broth with noodles and an IPA. Holy shit. My life was saved by that broth and beer!
They also gave me directions back to the finish area. I grabbed a couple Oreos on my way out and trudged back. The shortcut back was at least all on cleared paved roads, but of course, it was all uphill.
I’d tacked on another 4.6 miles to my day, for a total of 20.3. That was enough.
In the activity hall, as soon as I walked in, there was a tarp on the floor, for runners to leave their muddy trail shoes, rather than track mud all through the hall. I’d say 90 percent of the mud on my shoes was just from those few extra miles.
There were two rooms, one each for men and women, to change clothes. I was so glad to change into all new dry clothes.
Next step was food. There was so much! They had all the same sweet and salty snacks from the aid stations, but there was also more hot food, grilled cheese, bacon, French fries — excuse me, PHUNT phries — chili and lentil soup, and a cake that celebrated something, but I couldn’t tell what it was because most of it was gone by the time I got to it.
When I’d gotten my fill, I went for the beer. There was a help-yourself cooler of Yuengling, Rolling Rock, PBR and Corona Extra. There was also a volunteer making margaritas for anyone who preferred that, and some flavored vodka and spiced rum that probably would’ve gone well in hot coffee.
Meanwhile, they had a DJ playing music the whole time, and there was a computer where you could get a little receipt printout of your official results. Oh, and a table selling more PHUNT gear, like beanies, T-shirts and Christmas tree ornaments.
While I waited for Melissa to finish, I talked to some of the volunteers from the first aid station and Carl, the race director, and told him how much I’d enjoyed the event.
And then Melissa made it back! Obviously the second lap was slower than the first with the trails’ deteriorating condition, but she did it, and was still smiling when she got back to the activity hall.
Melissa got food and changed her clothes too, and then we hung out a while before leaving for home.

With our finisher medals and dry clothes.
We stopped at a Dunkin Donuts on the way out of Elkton (this time of year, I have an afternoon hot chocolate habit.) I guess that detour put us in a slightly different part of the city, because the GPS sent us home a completely different way than we’d come up, but it was about the same amount of time.
When Melissa dropped me off, we agreed to sign up for PHUNT 2020. It’s nice to have a January race to look forward to, and this is a really good one.

Buff, pint glass, can koozie, bib and medal with detachable bottle opener (the ribbon has all the signs that were posted along the course.)
I hung up all my stinky, muddy running clothes to air out, then went to Clark’s parents’ house to pick up Pepper. Finally home for good, I took a hot shower, got into my pajamas and promptly fell asleep on the couch.
Sunday, my quads were the sorest they’ve been in years! Sitting down and standing back up were both seriously challenging.
It rained overnight and was in the mid 50s when I first let out Pepper in the morning, but the temperature started dropping sometime during the day, while the wind got stronger. By the time the sun went down, the “feels like” temp was down to 9 degrees.
Other than rinsing all the mud out of my trail shoes and hanging them up to dry, I did absolutely nothing Sunday. It was awesome!
I watched both football playoff games. Clark was texting me from the Saints game. He said the Superdome was too loud haha.
Today, I had a morning assignment. Part of it involved being outside. It was -2 degrees because the wind was still absolutely screaming. I mean, yeah, it’s January, but come on.
So I went and froze my butt off, and when I got home a few hours later, I had to clean up everything Pepper had been doing with his butt in the utility room while I was gone. I also had to put him in the shower because he’d walked through it. He looked extremely upset by it, but the last time he wound up in the shower after walking through one of his messes, it cured him of that habit for several years, so fingers crossed that did the trick again.
I still have a short easy run on the schedule for today that I’m not looking forward to because of, No. 1, the aforementioned extreme cold and, No. 2, my quads are still a little sore. Well, I invested in fleece-lined running tights and a balaclava for a reason, and I’ve run in worse, so I will try to get out there once I get done writing the article about this morning’s assignment.